I have two nannies and no guilt—here's why

From entrepreneur and mom Lexi Miles Corrin

When it comes to raising kids, it takes a village. It always has and it always will. I am certainly no exception. With four kids now five years old and under (including a set of 20-month-old twins) I have absolutely no shame in admitting I have help—a lot of it, actually.

Find your village

I believe it’s time we normalize asking for help in all the ways we need. Think about it: not that long ago, there was a literal village, a community of families living together or close by supporting each other so the village as a whole could thrive. There would be a mama there for you in the morning to take the colicky baby you have been up all night nursing, so you could get some rest. There would be a playdate after school for your children because you didn’t have time to get dinner on the table. Her community was a safe space where everyone had a role in collectively child rearing and growing together.

It’s a beautiful concept—a group of women rallying together to raise the next generation. Nowadays, we live more isolated from immediate family and friends. We live in single-family homes, often in bigger cities, a car ride or maybe even a plane ride away from family. Many of us choose to have a dual-income household, meaning both parental figures are working.

Being the best parents you can be

My husband and I are both building businesses that we are super passionate about, and we both know that our work makes us better, happier parents to our children. So, when we found out we were pregnant again with our third (and fourth baby—yikes!) the first thing we did, after the initial shock, was figure out where we needed support. With our families living plane rides away, we knew we needed help so that we could continue to show up in the best way possible for our kids, allowing us to strike a balance between being able to work while raising our family and maintaining our relationship with each other. Because, yes, date nights are a necessity in our world.

Not letting guilt win

At first, I had a hard time giving up control and giving in to receiving help. After all, I was raised in a traditional household with an incredible stay-at-home mom who was always there for everything and, in my eyes, did it all! When we finally hired a nanny, I quickly felt the mom guilt mounting as judgements raced through my head: “I should be the one doing all the things for all my kids, shouldn’t I? If I can’t do it all myself, doesn’t that mean I’m less of a mom, less of a wife, less of a business owner? Simply less? Suzy down the street looks like she has it all together and has no help!” 

But then it hit me, it was quite the opposite, if I refused help, that’s when I would be less of a mom, less of a wife, less of a business owner. I would be torn in so many directions that I wouldn’t be helpful to anyone. By receiving help, I get to show up for my kids as my very best self. I get to make a conscious effort when I’m with them to leave my work at the door (for the most part); I’m able to be present. I compartmentalize everything in my life, and I can do that because I opened myself up to receiving help and prioritize the things that are the non-negotiables that I do, and ask for help on the things that I know others can do—and likely will do better than me. I ask for help where I need it, and I share with others that I have help because, as moms, we need to give ourselves a break.  Oh, and by the way, “Suzy Down the Street” also had help, but I didn’t know about it because she was too afraid to share the fear of being judged.

What help looks like for Lexi

Help can come is so many ways. It can be a friend you carpool with to school or do weekly play dates with, parents that come over and help or take your kids for sleepovers. For us, it’s our nannies—they truly have become family members. I feel proud that I get to employ these incredible women (yes, I have two) and help support their families and children. And for our children, we are normalizing asking for help. We are admitting that it can’t all be done alone. We show the importance of balance, self-care, working and earning independently and fostering a strong relationship with our partners. We are building our own village filled with physical and emotional support.

My message to you is to prioritize help in whatever way you need it. You can and you should. Do not feel guilty. Do not talk yourself out of it. Motherhood is the hardest job in the world. We need to find ways to fill our cups, to recharge and reset. Most importantly, as women, we need to normalize having help and be proud of it.

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Lexi Miles Corrin is an inspiring and empowering entrepreneur. The Founder and CEO of WAXON Laser + Waxbar is committed to empowering everyone who walks through those doors: from clients to employees to franchise owners. Over the past decade, Lexi has grown WAXON into a successful franchise with more than 20 locations across Canada. At the core of her business success, is a mentor and leadership program built on authenticity, consistency, and vulnerability. Her growing business also includes South, a line of intimate skin care products. As the mother of four children, Lexi shares what it truly takes to “have it all” through keynotes, podcast appearances, and as co-host of the popular “We Go There” podcast. Lexi is a champion for women who want to pursue their dreams, by showing how to build confidence, grow wealth, and forge their own path.